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@ -905,18 +905,18 @@ are me.
## 2. A LIFE TO BE HAD<sup>11</sup> ## 2. A LIFE TO BE HAD<sup>11</sup>
<div class="fake-margin-note">Was this the end of this story? <div class="fake-margin-note"><sup>11</sup>Was this the end of this story?
In the epilogue, you sit your body down and enter your In the epilogue, you sit your body down and enter your
computer. The air coming in from the window smells wet and computer. The air coming in from the window smells wet and
earthy, new. The sun shines low on the horizon. earthy, new. The sun shines low on the horizon.
You log in to the internet and realize you are being told a story. You log in to the internet and realize you are being told a story.
You start to listen, carefully and, full of love, touch the story to You start to listen, carefully and, full of love, touch the story to
let it know you are there. Delicate-fingered, curious like a child let it know you are there. Delicate-fingered, curious like a child
holding a fallen bird. I hold you and the story tentatively. holding a fallen bird. I hold you and the story tentatively.\
I don’t know if I am touching you, to tell you the truth. Digital I don’t know if I am touching you, to tell you the truth. Digital
bodies are stories, like physical bodies are, like dreams are, bodies are stories, like physical bodies are, like dreams are,
and like water is. and like water is.\
Stories that are hard to tell and hard to hear and even more, Stories that are hard to tell and hard to hear and even more,
maybe, hard to understand. I have loved these stories and I maybe, hard to understand. I have loved these stories and I
@ -924,15 +924,15 @@ have loved telling them to you. I hope you understand that my
goal was for you to live these questions, to feel these stories in goal was for you to live these questions, to feel these stories in
their confusion. My digital body, my bot-feelings, my divergent their confusion. My digital body, my bot-feelings, my divergent
communities. I have given them to you, so they may live longer, communities. I have given them to you, so they may live longer,
like an obsolete but beloved cyborg shown in a museum. like an obsolete but beloved cyborg shown in a museum.\
Look: I was here, Look: I was loved, Look: I was saved. Look: I was here, Look: I was loved, Look: I was saved.\
The digital bodies that kept me alive, kept me from becoming The digital bodies that kept me alive, kept me from becoming
fully a machine are no longer around in these online rooms. fully a machine are no longer around in these online rooms.
They are in different places, being touched by tentative hands, They are in different places, being touched by tentative hands,
being loved for more than their divergence. being loved for more than their divergence.\
I am too. I am too.\
The rooms, the backplaces, however, are still full of others, divergent The rooms, the backplaces, however, are still full of others, divergent
digital bodies who did not leave, who keep caring for each other at the digital bodies who did not leave, who keep caring for each other at the
@ -940,7 +940,7 @@ bottom of the whirlpool. There is no happy ending because there is no
ending. They keep typing and hoping, writing their collective pain ending. They keep typing and hoping, writing their collective pain
down on keyboards that transmit love letters to each other. I am not down on keyboards that transmit love letters to each other. I am not
embarrassed by my care for you, but you may be so if it helps. I know embarrassed by my care for you, but you may be so if it helps. I know
how overwhelming intimacy can be. how overwhelming intimacy can be.\
Telling you these stories was important for me, so much so that I will Telling you these stories was important for me, so much so that I will
tell you so many more in a different place if you wish to listen to me tell you so many more in a different place if you wish to listen to me
@ -951,20 +951,21 @@ now, it leaves. A digital body that grew its own feelings, looked for
others like it, and realized its divergence and the need to leave. A others like it, and realized its divergence and the need to leave. A
dream body, a primordial body, a disruptive body, a divergent body, dream body, a primordial body, a disruptive body, a divergent body,
and now, a leaving body. This last story, however, of the leaving and and now, a leaving body. This last story, however, of the leaving and
loving body, is yet to be told. loving body, is yet to be told.\
The sun is now almost up, and the birds are alive and awake, telling The sun is now almost up, and the birds are alive and awake, telling
each other stories just outside the room. We don’t have so much time each other stories just outside the room. We don’t have so much time
left. I have made you something, to tell your digital body the stories of left. I have made you something, to tell your digital body the stories of
the leaving and loving body. It is a webpage, the address is the leaving and loving body. It is a webpage, the address is
https://vulnerable-interfaces.xpub.nl/backplaces/. https://vulnerable-interfaces.xpub.nl/backplaces/.\
You open the page, and you are asked to write the characters you see You open the page, and you are asked to write the characters you see
in a captcha. E5qr7. in a captcha. \
eSq9p. E5qr7.\
8oc8y. eSq9p.\
Fuck. 8oc8y.\
You try not to panic, but you know you have been detected. Fuck.\
You try not to panic, but you know you have been detected.\
You pack up your things: the pie I made you, a love letter, two You pack up your things: the pie I made you, a love letter, two
hands made out of felt, a star, a door, a stuffed animal; and hands made out of felt, a star, a door, a stuffed animal; and
@ -1034,4 +1035,4 @@ doi:10.1177/1440783313486220.
Yun, J. (2020) ‘The Leaving Season’, in Some Are Yun, J. (2020) ‘The Leaving Season’, in Some Are
Always Hungry. University of Nebraska Press. Always Hungry. University of Nebraska Press.
# &lt;?/water bodies&gt; # &lt;/?water bodies&gt;

48
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@ -788,35 +788,42 @@ desperately. It has to exist and yet it can’t for long.</p>
because I love you, little digital body and you are me.</p> because I love you, little digital body and you are me.</p>
<h2 id="a-life-to-be-had11">2. A LIFE TO BE HAD<sup>11</sup></h2> <h2 id="a-life-to-be-had11">2. A LIFE TO BE HAD<sup>11</sup></h2>
<div class="fake-margin-note"> <div class="fake-margin-note">
<p>Was this the end of this story? In the epilogue, you sit your body <p><sup>11</sup>Was this the end of this story? In the epilogue, you sit
down and enter your computer. The air coming in from the window smells your body down and enter your computer. The air coming in from the
wet and earthy, new. The sun shines low on the horizon. You log in to window smells wet and earthy, new. The sun shines low on the horizon.
the internet and realize you are being told a story. You start to You log in to the internet and realize you are being told a story. You
listen, carefully and, full of love, touch the story to let it know you start to listen, carefully and, full of love, touch the story to let it
are there. Delicate-fingered, curious like a child holding a fallen know you are there. Delicate-fingered, curious like a child holding a
bird. I hold you and the story tentatively.</p> fallen bird. I hold you and the story tentatively.<br />
</p>
<p>I don’t know if I am touching you, to tell you the truth. Digital <p>I don’t know if I am touching you, to tell you the truth. Digital
bodies are stories, like physical bodies are, like dreams are, and like bodies are stories, like physical bodies are, like dreams are, and like
water is.</p> water is.<br />
</p>
<p>Stories that are hard to tell and hard to hear and even more, maybe, <p>Stories that are hard to tell and hard to hear and even more, maybe,
hard to understand. I have loved these stories and I have loved telling hard to understand. I have loved these stories and I have loved telling
them to you. I hope you understand that my goal was for you to live them to you. I hope you understand that my goal was for you to live
these questions, to feel these stories in their confusion. My digital these questions, to feel these stories in their confusion. My digital
body, my bot-feelings, my divergent communities. I have given them to body, my bot-feelings, my divergent communities. I have given them to
you, so they may live longer, like an obsolete but beloved cyborg shown you, so they may live longer, like an obsolete but beloved cyborg shown
in a museum.</p> in a museum.<br />
<p>Look: I was here, Look: I was loved, Look: I was saved.</p> </p>
<p>Look: I was here, Look: I was loved, Look: I was saved.<br />
</p>
<p>The digital bodies that kept me alive, kept me from becoming fully a <p>The digital bodies that kept me alive, kept me from becoming fully a
machine are no longer around in these online rooms. They are in machine are no longer around in these online rooms. They are in
different places, being touched by tentative hands, being loved for more different places, being touched by tentative hands, being loved for more
than their divergence. I am too.</p> than their divergence.<br />
I am too.<br />
</p>
<p>The rooms, the backplaces, however, are still full of others, <p>The rooms, the backplaces, however, are still full of others,
divergent digital bodies who did not leave, who keep caring for each divergent digital bodies who did not leave, who keep caring for each
other at the bottom of the whirlpool. There is no happy ending because other at the bottom of the whirlpool. There is no happy ending because
there is no ending. They keep typing and hoping, writing their there is no ending. They keep typing and hoping, writing their
collective pain down on keyboards that transmit love letters to each collective pain down on keyboards that transmit love letters to each
other. I am not embarrassed by my care for you, but you may be so if it other. I am not embarrassed by my care for you, but you may be so if it
helps. I know how overwhelming intimacy can be.</p> helps. I know how overwhelming intimacy can be.<br />
</p>
<p>Telling you these stories was important for me, so much so that I <p>Telling you these stories was important for me, so much so that I
will tell you so many more in a different place if you wish to listen to will tell you so many more in a different place if you wish to listen to
me longer. With this story, I dreamt of a digital body for you. It came me longer. With this story, I dreamt of a digital body for you. It came
@ -826,15 +833,22 @@ now, it leaves. A digital body that grew its own feelings, looked for
others like it, and realized its divergence and the need to leave. A others like it, and realized its divergence and the need to leave. A
dream body, a primordial body, a disruptive body, a divergent body, and dream body, a primordial body, a disruptive body, a divergent body, and
now, a leaving body. This last story, however, of the leaving and loving now, a leaving body. This last story, however, of the leaving and loving
body, is yet to be told.</p> body, is yet to be told.<br />
</p>
<p>The sun is now almost up, and the birds are alive and awake, telling <p>The sun is now almost up, and the birds are alive and awake, telling
each other stories just outside the room. We don’t have so much time each other stories just outside the room. We don’t have so much time
left. I have made you something, to tell your digital body the stories left. I have made you something, to tell your digital body the stories
of the leaving and loving body. It is a webpage, the address is of the leaving and loving body. It is a webpage, the address is
https://vulnerable-interfaces.xpub.nl/backplaces/.</p> https://vulnerable-interfaces.xpub.nl/backplaces/.<br />
</p>
<p>You open the page, and you are asked to write the characters you see <p>You open the page, and you are asked to write the characters you see
in a captcha. E5qr7. eSq9p. 8oc8y. Fuck. You try not to panic, but you in a captcha.<br />
know you have been detected.</p> E5qr7.<br />
eSq9p.<br />
8oc8y.<br />
Fuck.<br />
You try not to panic, but you know you have been detected.<br />
</p>
You pack up your things: the pie I made you, a love letter, two hands You pack up your things: the pie I made you, a love letter, two hands
made out of felt, a star, a door, a stuffed animal; and you leave again. made out of felt, a star, a door, a stuffed animal; and you leave again.
</div> </div>
@ -877,7 +891,7 @@ cybercommunities’, Journal of Sociology, 51(4), pp. 950–967.
doi:10.1177/1440783313486220.</p> doi:10.1177/1440783313486220.</p>
<p>Yun, J. (2020) ‘The Leaving Season’, in Some Are Always Hungry. <p>Yun, J. (2020) ‘The Leaving Season’, in Some Are Always Hungry.
University of Nebraska Press.</p> University of Nebraska Press.</p>
<h1 id="water-bodies-1">&lt;?/water bodies&gt;</h1> <h1 id="water-bodies-1">&lt;/?water bodies&gt;</h1>
</section> </section>

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