-
-
- Introduction +
- Introduction
- Backplaces - - - -
- <?water bodies> -
- Talking Documents +
- Backplaces @@ -42,7 +37,7 @@ -
- Wink! +
- Talking Documents @@ -52,40 +47,50 @@ -
- do you ever dream about work? +
- Wink!
- ⊞ + + + +
- do you ever dream about work? +
- Special Issues +
- Special Issues -
- Garden Leeszaal +
- Garden Leeszaal -
- Console +
- Console -
- TTY +
- TTY -
- Colophon +
- Colophon + + + + +
- Reviews @@ -145,110 +150,12 @@ touched.
@@ -22,17 +22,12 @@ -
-
Backplaces
-vulnerable-interfaces.xpub.nl/backplaces
-Hi.
-I made this play for you. It is a question, for us to hold together.
Is all intimacy about bodies? What is it about our bodies that makes
-intimacy? What happens when our bodies distance intimacy from us? This
-small anthology of poems and short stories lives with these
-questions—about having a body without intimacy and intimacy without a
-body. This project is also a homage to everyone who has come before and
-alongside me, sharing their vulnerability and emotions on the Internet.
-I called the places where these things happen backplaces. They are
-small, tender online rooms where people experiencing societally
-uncomfortable pain can find relief, ease, and transcendence.
-
I made three backplaces for you to see, click, and feel: Solar
-Sibling, Hermit Fantasy, and Cake Intimacies. Each of these is the
-result of its own unique performance or project. Some of the stories I
-will share carry memories of pain—both physical and emotional. As you
-sit in the audience, know I am with you, holding your hand through each
-scene. If the performance feels overwhelming at any point, you have my
-full permission to step out, take a break, or leave. This is not
-choreographed, and I care deeply for you.
-
-
-Solar Sibling is an online performance of shared loss about leaving
-and siblings. This project used comments people left on TikTok poetry. I
-extracted the emotions from these comments, mixed them with my own, and
-crafted them into poems. It is an ongoing performance, ending only when
-your feelings are secretly whispered to me. When you do, by typing into
-the comment box, your feelings are sent to me and the first act closes
-as the sun rises.
-
-
-
-
-Hermit Fantasy is a short story about a bot who wants to be a hermit.
-Inspired by an email response from a survey I conducted about receiving
-emotional support on the Internet, this story explores the contradiction
-of being online while wanting to disconnect. As an act it’s a series of
-letters, click by click.
-
-
-
-
-Cake Intimacies is a performance that took a year to bring together.
-It is a small selection of stories people told me and I held to memory
-and rewrote here. The stories come from two performances I hosted.
-First, I asked participants to eat cake, sitting facing or away from
-each other and sharing their stories about cake and the Internet. The
-second performance was hosted at the Art Meets Radical Openness
-Festival, as part of the Turning of the Internet workshop. For this
-performance, I predicted participants’ future lives on the Internet
-using felted archetypes and received stories from their Internet past in
-return. Now the stories are here, each of them a cake with a filling
-that tells a story, merging the bodily with the digital and making a
-mess of it all.
-
-
-
-
-The play ends as all plays do. The curtains close, the website stays
-but the stories will never sound the same. For the final act, I give you
-the stories. It’s one last game, one last joke to ask my question again.
-Digital intimacies about the digital, our bodies and the cakes we eat.
-For the last act, I ask you to eat digital stories. To eat a comment, to
-eat a digital intimacy. Sharing an act of physical intimacy with
-yourself and with me, by eating sweets together. Sweets about digital
-intimacies that never had a body. There is no moral, no bow to wrap the
-story in. A great big mess of transcendence into the digital, of
-intimacy and of bodies. The way it always is. Thankfully.
-
+
-
+
+
<?water bodies>
A -narrative exploration of divergent digital intimacies
+narrative exploration ofdivergent digital intimacies
-Water, stories, the body,
@@ -269,7 +176,6 @@ that hide and show what’s
hidden.
(Rumi, 1995 translation)
꙳for you
All intimacy is about bodies. Is this true? Does it matter? I doubt it. Do you know? Let’s find out, maybe.
@@ -876,14 +782,15 @@ stand it. It ruins both of us to be seen this way and we need it so desperately. It has to exist and yet it can’t for long.I leave even though I love all of your digital bodies. I leave because I love you, little digital body and you are me.
-2. A LIFE TO BE HAD
-Was this the end of this story? In the -epilogue, you sit your body down and enter your computer. The air coming -in from the window smells wet and earthy, new. The sun shines low on the -horizon. You log in to the internet and realize you are being told a -story. You start to listen, carefully and, full of love, touch the story -to let it know you are there. Delicate-fingered, curious like a child -holding a fallen bird. I hold you and the story tentatively.
+2. A LIFE TO BE HAD11
+Was this the end of this story? In the epilogue, you sit your body +down and enter your computer. The air coming in from the window smells +wet and earthy, new. The sun shines low on the horizon. You log in to +the internet and realize you are being told a story. You start to +listen, carefully and, full of love, touch the story to let it know you +are there. Delicate-fingered, curious like a child holding a fallen +bird. I hold you and the story tentatively.
I don’t know if I am touching you, to tell you the truth. Digital bodies are stories, like physical bodies are, like dreams are, and like water is.
@@ -924,9 +831,9 @@ https://vulnerable-interfaces.xpub.nl/backplaces/.You open the page, and you are asked to write the characters you see in a captcha. E5qr7. eSq9p. 8oc8y. Fuck. You try not to panic, but you know you have been detected.
-You pack up your things: the pie I made you, a love letter, two hands -made out of felt, a star, a door, a stuffed animal; and you leave -again.
+You pack up your things: the pie I made you, a love letter, two hands +made out of felt, a star, a door, a stuffed animal; and you leave again. +references
Adler, P.A. and Adler, P. (2008) ‘The Cyber Worlds of self-injurers: Deviant communities, relationships, and selves’, Symbolic Interaction, @@ -974,100 +881,112 @@ University of Nebraska Press.
Talking Documents
- -
-
-This project appeared as a need to explore potential bureaucratic -dramaturgies within the educational institution I was part as a student. -I was curious about educational bureaucratic mechanisms being driven by -smaller-scale paperwork struggles and peers’ narratives, stories and -experiences. However, unexpected emergencies - due to my eviction on the -31st of January 2024 - placed centrally my personal struggles unfolded -in parallel with the making period. I ended up conducting accidentally -auto-ethnography as the project was dynamically being reshaped due to -the material constraints of the bureaucratic timeline.
-Talking Documents are performative bureaucratic text inspections that -intend to create temporal public interventions through performative -readings. I utilized the paperwork interface of my smaller-scale story -in order to unravel and foreground questions related to the role of -bureaucracy as less material border and as a regulatory mechanism -reflecting narratives, ideologies, policies.
-Central element of this project is a seven-act scenario that -construct my personal paperwork story, unraveling the actual struggles -of my communication with the government. The body of the text of the -“theatrical” script is sourced from the original documents, email -threads as well as recordings of the conversations with the municipality -of Rotterdam I documented and archived throughout this period. I -preserved the sequence of the given sentences and by discarding the -graphic design of the initial forms, I structured and repurposed the -text into a playable scenario.
+Backplaces
+vulnerable-interfaces.xpub.nl/backplaces
+Hi.
+I made this play for you. It is a question, for us to hold together.
Is all intimacy about bodies? What is it about our bodies that makes
+intimacy? What happens when our bodies distance intimacy from us? This
+small anthology of poems and short stories lives with these
+questions—about having a body without intimacy and intimacy without a
+body. This project is also a homage to everyone who has come before and
+alongside me, sharing their vulnerability and emotions on the Internet.
+I called the places where these things happen backplaces. They are
+small, tender online rooms where people experiencing societally
+uncomfortable pain can find relief, ease, and transcendence.
+
I made three backplaces for you to see, click, and feel: Solar
+Sibling, Hermit Fantasy, and Cake Intimacies. Each of these is the
+result of its own unique performance or project. Some of the stories I
+will share carry memories of pain—both physical and emotional. As you
+sit in the audience, know I am with you, holding your hand through each
+scene. If the performance feels overwhelming at any point, you have my
+full permission to step out, take a break, or leave. This is not
+choreographed, and I care deeply for you.
+
-
+
+
Solar Sibling is an online performance of shared loss about leaving
+and siblings. This project used comments people left on TikTok poetry. I
+extracted the emotions from these comments, mixed them with my own, and
+crafted them into poems. It is an ongoing performance, ending only when
+your feelings are secretly whispered to me. When you do, by typing into
+the comment box, your feelings are sent to me and the first act closes
+as the sun rises.
+
-
+
+
I perceive the document as a unit and as the fundamental symbolic -interface of the bureaucratic network. The transformation of the -materiality of a document into a scenario to be enacted collectively in -public aims to examine these artifacts and highlight the shrouded -performative elements of these processes.
-I see the collective readings of these scenarios as a way of instant -publishing and as a communal tool of inspecting bureaucratic bordering -infrastructures. How can these re-enactments be situated in different -institutional contexts and examine their structures? I organized a -series of performative readings of my own bureaucratic literature in -different spaces and contexts, pubic and semi-public WDKA, Art Meets -Radical Openness Festival in Linz, the City Hall of Rotterdam where I -invited people to perform the play together, like a tiny theater.
-
+
+
The marginal voices of potential applicants are embodying and -enacting a role. “The speech does not only describe but brings things -into existence”(Austin, 1975). My intention was to stretch the limits of -dramaturgical speech through vocalizing a document and turn individual -administrative cases into public ones. How do the inscribed words in the -documents are not descriptive but on the contrary “are instrumentalized -in getting things done”(Butler,1997). Words as active agents. Bodies as -low-tech “human microphones”. A group of people performs the -bureaucratic scenario in chorus, out loud, in the corridor of the -school’s building, in the main hall, at the square right across, outside -of the municipality building.
-I documented and recorded these public acts and I re-created the -collectively voiced scenario. This audio piece is a constellation of -different recordings and soundscapes of these public moments, a vocal -archive, published in the graduation exhibition of XPUB in 2024.
+Hermit Fantasy is a short story about a bot who wants to be a hermit.
+Inspired by an email response from a survey I conducted about receiving
+emotional support on the Internet, this story explores the contradiction
+of being online while wanting to disconnect. As an act it’s a series of
+letters, click by click.
+
-
+
+
-
+
+
Cake Intimacies is a performance that took a year to bring together.
+It is a small selection of stories people told me and I held to memory
+and rewrote here. The stories come from two performances I hosted.
+First, I asked participants to eat cake, sitting facing or away from
+each other and sharing their stories about cake and the Internet. The
+second performance was hosted at the Art Meets Radical Openness
+Festival, as part of the Turning of the Internet workshop. For this
+performance, I predicted participants’ future lives on the Internet
+using felted archetypes and received stories from their Internet past in
+return. Now the stories are here, each of them a cake with a filling
+that tells a story, merging the bodily with the digital and making a
+mess of it all.
+
+
+
+
+The play ends as all plays do. The curtains close, the website stays
+but the stories will never sound the same. For the final act, I give you
+the stories. It’s one last game, one last joke to ask my question again.
+Digital intimacies about the digital, our bodies and the cakes we eat.
+For the last act, I ask you to eat digital stories. To eat a comment, to
+eat a digital intimacy. Sharing an act of physical intimacy with
+yourself and with me, by eating sweets together. Sweets about digital
+intimacies that never had a body. There is no moral, no bow to wrap the
+story in. A great big mess of transcendence into the digital, of
+intimacy and of bodies. The way it always is. Thankfully.
+
+
+Performing the Bureaucratic Border(line)s
+
introduction
This thesis is an assemblageI live somewhere in the margins of scattered references, footnotes, citations, @@ -1368,20 +1290,18 @@ rights” (Khosravi, 2010)
my phone during a protest on migration at Dam Square in Amsterdam. I insert part of the speech of a Palestinian woman addressing the matter of undocumentedness. Date and time of the recording 18th of June 2023, -15:05.
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